5 things I’ve processed so far post-grad
As I’m getting ready to completely move across the country and end this foreign transition period called post-grad, I’ve had way too much time on my hands to sit and think. Some of them I learned during college, others only started to click once I stepped away from the routine and safety net of it all. So here’s my little brain-dump that’s messy, reflective, and very much from the heart of a 22-year-old still figuring it out:
1. Find closure in the unknown, the answers never given, and the confusion.
I wish someone told me earlier that not everything in life wraps up with a satisfying conclusion. Sometimes, you don’t get the apology. You don’t get the “why.” You don’t get the text explaining what went wrong or the moment that suddenly makes it all make sense.
And I’ve spent so much energy trying to “figure it out”, reading between the lines of conversations, replaying things in my head I might have missed a key moment from. But at some point, I realized (or am still trying to realize) that closure isn’t something that always comes externally.
It’s something you decide to give yourself. It’s the moment you stop waiting for permission to move forward. It’s choosing peace over answers. And while it still feels frustrating, there’s something really freeing in saying: “I don’t know why it happened… but I don’t need to anymore.”
2. Your gut never fails you. Trust your intuition.
I mean this one goes without explaining. You always know. And you might look or sound crazy for connecting those dots that had almost no connection between the two, but when you know, you know. Your gut is there to protect you and guide you, so listen to it.
3. Find small bits of comfort in the uncomfortableness
You might wake up and feel completely disoriented with your routine (I know I do), or you might still try to be pieicing together a routine of what this new period of time looks like. But finding the little moments of gratutude in my day makes me more at peace with the chaos of whatever life has come to be right now. Whether it’s the neighbors dog that barks at you now when you go on your everyday walks, or the fact that you don’t wake up every morning to a Goodmorning text from your mom because you’re lucky eough to be back under her roof one last time. Find solace in the unknown.
4. Your body remembers what your heart tries to forget
I’ve learned you have to let your body process what your mind is still untangling. And that’s way easier said than done. You don’t get that tightness in your chest or that lump in your throat for no obvious reason.
Our bodies keep score. Even if your mind has moved on, your body might still be holding sadness or stress that you haven’t consciously processed yet.
I’ve learned to pay attention to that. To slow down and let myself feel instead of constantly distracting myself. Some days, that looks like journaling. Other days, it’s literally not getting out of bed. Or going on a walk.
It’s uncomfortable, but it’s also healing. Processing doesn’t have a deadline. Sometimes your body needs a little longer than your brain does, and that’s okay. But what’s most important is to realize that and to be honest with yourself about that.
5. You’re not starting over, you’re starting from experience.
When you’re entering a new chapter of life, it’s so easy to feel like you’re starting from scratch.
But you’re not.
You’re bringing everything with you.
You’re walking into the next chapter already knowing how to be a roommate, a best friend, a girlfriend, ect. You know how to set boundaries now. You know how to cook something other than pasta (maybe). You know how to get through the hard stuff because you survived college and all that comes with it. And truthfully nothing will ever be more of a shock to the body than college.
I used to (and on a bad day, I do) feel terrified of how unfamiliar the future looked. Now, I remind myself that I’ve already survived every other “first time” in my life. And this? This is just the next one.